Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Any advice on how to end a long-term relationship with as little pain as possible... & can we stay friends?

My boyfriend %26amp; I are highschool sweethearts %26amp; best friends, %26amp; as hard as it is for me to admit it, i've fallen out of love with him. I think the relationship has just run it's course..%26amp; i wouldn't take back a day of it. We have a very special bond %26amp; we've been able to teach each other important lessons so that just makes what i have to do so much harder. I'm 25yo this year %26amp; have an overwhelming urge to live my own life. I want to have my own place %26amp; my own friends %26amp; experience more of what life has on offer. I haven't found another man.. I don't want one right now, but it would be fun to flirt with a cute guy %26amp; to feel like I was attractive to men again. I still feel a huge amount of love for him, but i'm kidding myself to think i'm still in-love with him. I have started to leave the relationship mentally, but I can't seem to work out the best way to explain all this to him. It sounds so cliche... Does anyone have any experience or advice to share please?Any advice on how to end a long-term relationship with as little pain as possible... %26amp; can we stay friends?
Tell him what you actually feelAny advice on how to end a long-term relationship with as little pain as possible... %26amp; can we stay friends?
Just be honest with him. Let him know that you need some time for yourself.
If you tell him, you will break his heart and won't be able to remain friends, probably! Life doesn't have more to offer than true friendship - you can choose to love him for who he is and choose to serve him as his wife and mother of his children.
No matter what you do it is going to hurt, and the hurt is going to be on you. seriously.


When you get past this wanting to do something new, you will cry for the security of what you have now and so few have it.


Instead of thinking this way you need to be starting a college course or something.


let the new thing be in something good for your future not something that will destroy the few good things you will have in life.


good luck with your choices.


PS maybe think about making yourself sexy to him.
just be honest. as hard as it sounds. it is better to do it now before you end up marrying him out of fear of breaking his heart. if he truly loves you and i am sure he does, he will be hurt but will understand that you are doing what is best for you. Let him know that you need time and space to figure out who you are and that if you two are meant to be then it will be but until then, you need to be single and free to figure out your life. it may be better to just cut it off because i'm sure if you start dating other people, he will be hurt and deep down i am sure if he called you up and started talking about a woman he met, you would not want to hear about it either. so just let it go and see how you feel after a month or so. he will always be a part of you even if you two aren't boyfriend and girlfriend.
I was in a similar situation. I chose to leave my boyfriend, he took this so badly, and told me that I had broken his heart. He says that he doesn't want to be friends with me, and this hurts me so much. I hope you do not have the same problem and can still be friends, good luck!..x..
Oh yeah, I have that experience!! Not an easy one. But you have to be up front. I mean if the shoe was on the other foot you would want him to tell you. I mean dont lead him on any more then your doing. And explain your actions to him. Let him know it has nothing to do with wanting to be with some one else. You two probably just out grown each other. You never know, feeling might be mutual.......
My wife left me after twenty-six years and felt similar to how you do. i took it very hard, but all she could do is admit it was over and give me the time to get used to it.





As to whether you can remain friends will be up to him.
just say it not wokring but then it is so I was hopeing that It want heart are friend ship
Missy,





Just send him your written question above. It is clear and concise as well as decent. It may hurt but what you wrote is not mean or ill-willed. You are both young and he will recover, trust me. Good luck . . .

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